Clockwise from top left: Kerrie Mather, Wal King, Phil Sullivan, Sol Trujillo and Gail Kelly. Illustration: Shakespeare
The idea of an end of the decade awards list did come to mind. But due to long-term memory problems, CBD has settled on reflecting on 2009.
Award for most visibly upset Chinese company wanting to invest in Australia: Chinalco.
The Chinese Government-owned firm expressed its displeasure after its deal to invest $US19.5 billion in Rio Tinto was knocked back. ''We are very disappointed with this outcome,'' the Chinalco president, Xiong Weiping, said. Weeks later a Rio executive, Stern Hu, was detained by Chinese authorities.
Best argument for excessive executive pay: Business Council of Australia.
The CEO union's submission to the Productivity Commission's inquiry into executive pay argued we all do well if the big guys and girls at the top are paid handsomely.
''It is not just the quantum, but also structure of CEO remuneration and the nature of performance benchmarks that filters down the ranks. In other words, restrictions on executive remuneration will typically have significant flow-on effects,'' the council reasoned.
Best question on excessive executive pay: Barnaby Joyce.
The Nationals senator posed this thought at the Senate inquiry into golden handshakes. ''Our major trading partner is China - what is the average pay or severance package there?''
Most novel explanation for excessive pay: Leighton chief executive Wal King.
King hit out at chief executives imported from the US for blowing out his pay packet to $12.6 million. ''All they have done is ratcheted up salaries for guys like me. They have parachuted in … told us what a crappy country we have and how we are also dopey and don't know what we are doing,'' he explained.
Most memorable lunchtime encounter: James Packer and Seven Network's chief executive, David Leckie.
The former TV executive Sam Chisholm's 70th birthday party at the Opera House was interrupted when Packer and Leckie had a heated conversation with finger-pointing and four-letter words.
Divine intervention award. Michael Jacobsen.
The son of the veteran concert promoter Kevin Jacobsen allegedly clinched the support of the Almighty for his proposed deed of company arrangement (DOCA) that was lodged with the administrator of the fallen operator of the Sydney Entertainment Centre, Arena Management.
''I have consulted God on this matter in recent days, and it is His wish that I propose a DOCA and resolve this situation. There is a need to reach out and meet the needs of others,'' Jacobsen jnr said in a letter to the administrator. His plan to pay unsecured creditors 35c in the dollar failed to gain traction. No miracle was performed.
Biggest bounced cheque award: Tabcorp.
The gambling concern admitted early in the year it had been dudded out of $11.5 million when a Hong Kong high-roller cashed a cheque. The gambler left the country before the cheque bounced.
Worst PR: Pacific Brands.
The undies and Bonds singlet maker was blasted over the perceived insensitivity shown to the 1850 workers it said it would make redundant. ''Ultimately this is the correct course of action for the future strength of the business and the remaining employees,'' chief Sue Morphett explained.
Most overuse of a new term: Westpac boss Gail Kelly.
The South African-born chief executive went to great lengths to let home loan borrowers know that we had entered a new era she called the ''new normal''. In the so-called new normal borrowing costs happened to be higher than in the old normal.
Most hard-fought negotiations: Macquarie Airports.
Led by the independent director Trevor Gerber, the airport owner beat major concessions to set itself free from its parent, Macquarie Bank. MAp, led by MD Kerrie Mather, had to pay only $345 million to buy out the management rights of the debt-strained portfolio of airport assets.
Best explanation for resignation: Trevor Rowe.
Rowe explained in a letter his plans to resign from the ASX board in late 2010. ''I am 67 years old and I believe it is time to better focus my incredibly active business life,'' penned Rowe, who also quit as the chairman of BrisConnections shareholder QIC and chancellor of Bond University. ''As to any political inferences that people may wish to make, I cannot control, nor do I wish to engage in media speculation and intrigues, but suffice to say I have many friends across all sides of the political spectrum,'' he explained.
Most overhyped initial public offer: Myer Holdings.
Never has a former Miss Universe been so well used by private equity to promote a sharemarket listing.
Most unorthodox use of company funds: Clive Peeters.
The whitegoods retailer claimed one of its employees falsified payroll accounts and transferred $19.4 million into external bank accounts.
Biggest supporter of a communist regime and hater of the ALP at same time: Clive Palmer.
The mining magnate and former spokesman for Queensland premier Sir Joh Bjelke-Petersen made a impassioned plea for the Rudd Government to allow more Chinese investment in Australia. The honorary Bond University professor called Treasurer Wayne Swan a ''goose''.
Best Houdini act: Asciano boss Mark Rowsthorn.
The Asciano chief was not looking too flash at the start of the year. His company had more than $4 billion of debt, a $244 million loss, a falling share price and alleged interest from private equity. But a heavily dilutive $2.3 billion raising and the departure of key executives eased calls for Rowsthorn to go. Even better, he somehow managed to pocket a $741,678 ''cash incentive''.
Do what I do, not what I say award: NAB chief Cameron Clyne.
The man who said the bank would stick to organic growth at the start of the year, had bought $6 billion of assets by the end of it.
Best use of everyday terms in the banking sector: ANZ chief executive Mike Smith.
While Gail Kelly stuck to ''new normal'', Smith attempted to get overly technical. He called mundane presentations ''Seinfeld updates'' and said New Zealand was due not for a L or V shaped recovery but a ''pig in the python'' one.
Fondest farewell: former Telstra chief Sol Trujillo.
''I would say that Australia definitely is different [from] the US. In many ways it was like stepping back in time,'' Trujillo told the BBC of the country he occasionally visited while heading Telstra. Trujillo, who left with a $3 million termination payment, also said Australia was a racist country.
Biggest dilution: Babcock & Brown Infrastructure.
The port and rail infrastructure operator passed a recapitalisation plan to help to trim $8.9 billion of debt. The $1.5 billion raising diluted its share price 1000 times. At least the consolidation of its securities made it look less ugly.
Most media shy former chief executive: Phil Sullivan.
The founder of the collapsed City Pacific kept a very low profile.
Centro award for surviving another year: Babcock & Brown Power.
The former Babcock satellite, with debts of about $3 billion, managed to dodge some obstacles from its lenders. One of these included having its banks waive a covenant that required it to secure an investment grade credit rating by June.
Most expensive relocation: James Hardie.
Just seven years after shifting its headquarters from Sydney to Amsterdam for, err, tax reasons, the building products company said it would cost $US71 million for it to move to Dublin. ''We see that as a short-term cost versus a long-term gain,'' Hardie's chief executive, Louis Gries, said. He warned the company could be hit by higher tax bills if it stayed in Holland. Hardie has not ruled out moving to the US.
Best name change: UGL Limited.
In a bid to avoid being confused with a US airline, the Trevor Rowe-chaired engineering firm United Group thought it would be clever to change its name to UGL and open itself up to being nicknamed UGLy.
Hospital pass: John Huggart.
The former AGL executive was named as the chief executive of the renewable energy retailer Jackgreen, three weeks before it was put into voluntary administration. ''He is a strategic thinker able to identify, influence and implement, and a leader who is able to attract, retain and develop winning teams,'' gloated the Jackgreen chairman and former AGL chief, Greg Martin.
This is the final CBD for the noughties. Feel free to continue using our online tips box or email srochfort@smh.com.au.
